Quoted

Often while traveling with a camera we arrive just as the sun slips over the horizon of a moment, too late to expose film, only time enough to expose our hearts. ~Minor White


Its a different world
Inside and outside this wall
And whenever I sneak out
It leaves me seeking self
I am left thinking about
What I am on each side of this wall 
Same or different ?
Real or unreal ?
Myself or not ?

Living or not ?

To existence !

Everything requires appreciation . The most important thing which perhaps must be appreciated daily is existence . I am here , on my desk , I can write and tell you what all is on my mind , I appreciate your presence here and you must appreciate mine . That's the thing about existence . Its a vicious circle of persona and aura ; your effect on the people around you . Its necessary , universal and yet not easily understandable .

The movie “Zindagi milegi na dobara” did not inspire this post so don't judge me before I tell you my story .

I am S . I am a punjabi girl. Yes I have known this for last 21 years and 11 months ( my birthday arrives next month ) but there is a very special thing about this day which I wish to share with all of you.

Its my Grandfather's birthday today . He is the most wise man I have seen . Some of you must be wondering why ? Why my grandfather and why not someone from the TIME magazine's most influential people ? I will let you know why.

In the morning one of his old friends Captain X called to wish him . Both of them are doctors by profession and hence share a lot of common subjects ( not patients ) to talk about . He was elated by the fact that Captain Sir remembered his birthday and hence invited him to the family gathering at our place in the evening. Captain X felt obliged and joined us. My grandfather's birthday is celebrated at our home because he is a simple man . He does not like to go out very much .

The evening arrived and my Buaa(aunt) and her husband were there too. Topicas picked up pace and were ranging from whiskey to movies to old songs and who will sing on this fine evening and to who will not. Everyone in my family (adults) is a doctor . They enjoy music like anything so singing goes hand in hand with every occasion .

My grandfather graced his whiskey today after a long time . He was happy to celebrate his life going hail and hearty . He wanted to sing , hear his daughter sing ( my buaa ) and his son sing ( my dad ) . I was getting the rest of the people soft drinks when I heard my Bua's voice that she believes in the mantra of "kal ho na ho"(tomorrow may never happen)  and likes to live the moment passing by. Everyone joins in with the fact that this was the motto of Zindagi na milegi dobara too. But she denies . She says that it’s not the same. One is about existence and the other about the way you lead your life.

The topic shifted to girls , when she read aloud a text saying , "A girl might never be a queen for his husband but will always remain a princess for his father " . A lot of sentiments jumped here and there and Captain X took the conversation up the sentimental level by singing two lines of a Punjabi song for daughters .

My grandmother being a  very emotional person ( I have never seen someone so emotional ) started crying. She is certainly very attached to me and my buaa and hence  the song triggered her . Just when she was wiping her tears my grandfather cracked a joke to which she laughed and stopped crying . "CHEERS! " was what he next said.

The cake was cut and the Birthday song , one version after the other ,  sung by all of us. The most amazing part was that he was singing the song himself too , inspiring creation of versions and then clapped after the entire epic series ended . He relished the cake , asked for more . He even discussed that Winston Churchill was a great man and enjoyed getting drunk .

I have seen people grow old and become gloomy , irritating and giving up on life . I am extremely happy that this is not the case with anyone in my family. They are very much young at heart . My grandmother even gossips with me about my friends and their boy  friends and I love the way she warns me not to have one .

I wish the same for everyone  . May they drink like a fish and stay spirited .

In the mean time the theme of bollywood movies will keep hitting this idea . Zip your moments always.

" maine har shaam par chaand ka intzaar kia hai...aur har subh suraj ki talaash ki haii ..
  mujhe pata hai hawaon ko thikana maloom hai mera...
  unhe pata hai maine zindagi mei har cheez ko ibaadat samjha hai
  jaise mai hi shaam aur wo ubhartaa suraj hu
  jo apni duniya m roshni bharta hai "

This entry is a part of the contest at BlogAdda.com in association with imlee.com




Soliloquy

Sole controversy of reasons
A raid of questions , behest self
It doesn't cease , unyielding
It enters a maze , or mind
Or maybe heart
The best place where this entire turmoil sinks
Will be where life is a muse
And words are the saviour

A soliloquy is all that sets
Wind beneath your wings

Perceptions

Perceptions are stiff

Like impenitent words

Too vocal to surrender 

Too real to veil

Truth struggles with perception 

A fatal , redundant battle for truth

For perceptions seek self

And self resorts to perceptions

wHiM ...

When she was all he needed , she was love.

When he was needed , he was , everything but love .

He was distance , notions and reasons .

Where love then ? 

A question of existence , who will decide who is right?

When night today pours his dream on her

She will watch him for the last time 

For he doesn't dream her by his side

She is a whim adrift , assuming love to be here and there .

FeTTeRED ..

I write 

And I erase

Like the wind takes away

Some stationary clouds 

And their existence

Without leaving a trail

Unlike the erased words

Which choke after being erased

Still murmur after 

I remove them from my page

I struggle to puke my thoughts

Maybe they don't need this air 

Maybe they feel shy

Maybe they leave some of their friends inside

Inside a closed soul 

How will they sound perfect then ?

The fettered erased words 

Neither written , nor erased .

He. ....

He clutches issues

Like rain grips the earth

He hesitates while he asks a few abrupt things

Like the soul hesitates before breathing a sin

He says he is ignorant 

Like a carefree bird encircling the clouds at dawn

He says he has seen life fall apart , gather 

Both phases emerging like inevitable branches of a tree

He says he has dissolved past

Like a tornado that gulps peace

He says he can go on this way

Like he knows , what his will be story like .

Like he is ,  time himself .

LoVe ...

To believe in Love is to be in love

When the fragile story moulds your mood

And you are upset because the hero couldn't nourish his dreams

When an eye brimming of Kohl stamps its darkness on your heart

A darkness where love will hide 

And light up the soul , to entrench meaning of its existence

The odd stranger smiles , and goodness wipes your agony over this mean world

How you wished , you never believed in this white page

A white page carved of mystery , insanity and goodness

A struggler meets life and loves to die for it

Till he breathes his last passion , standing and alive

How he wished , he could have hated the troubles his journey throws up

But then

Love would rip off every soul it rests in , and still be called 

Only love

150 posts old :) RanDom !

A few fresh drops is celebration 

A little downpour is wait

A bud beneath the porch is life

And a flower bloomed is survival

Never will the slog of the day , outshine , the ecstasy of the rain .

I guess some stains are only removed by universal tears .

I will drown , if you promise you will save me . I , like a two year old , still abide by my promises :)

The dashboard says I've turned 150 ! I'll beat every turtle on this planet ;) :P

rEal ?

Do you know that my secrets 

Are open in my nerves

Some entangled on face

Some superficially blue

But all verbally red in my traits

My picture , unclear and painted

Is still raw , because I have lived less , in years

And lived more , in instances

My annoyance , released with my ink

And my love , feeding my poem

My sanity , in my mistakes

And my judgement , in my denials

Maybe someday, I will be , for real to the world

For now I'm happy to exist , only in your story